Tag Archives: good life

Audit Your Social Circle and Influences

There comes a point in time when you realize certain people you’ve been hanging out with are hurting you more than helping you reach your ultimate goal. It’s not ideal, but sometimes you need to cut these people out of your life. If you don’t actively make an effort to audit your social circle and influences, then you’re not in control of your life.

When you decide to let go of a bad influence, you don’t have to literally tell them that you won’t be hanging out with them anymore, because of x, y, and z. That would be foolish and unnecessary. All you need to do is stop inviting them around you. At the same time, you want to gradually decline their invitations over the next couple of months. When you decline an invitation, you want to have good excuses for why you’re declining. Some fail-proof excuses are extra work hours, and family matters/ gatherings.

If you did things correctly, in the next 2 or 3 months, you won’t be spending much time with them anymore. Additionally, you won’t have to worry about negative repercussions or arguments.

Many high level people control their social circle, and the types of entertainment that they consume. They control the books they read, and the websites they visit. It’s an important aspect of our life that’s commonly overlooked by almost everyone. Most people stumble onto their social circle and influences. They never had a say in the matter. This is not a great way to make friends. You do have a say in the matter, and you should choose carefully.

How great of a person can you become if you surround yourself with negative people, bad influences, and you spend your free time watching stupid shows on Netflix/ YouTube? Not that great…

“You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” – Jim Rohn

On being sad and depressed

Why is it that you’re so sad and depressed? Especially, if you live in a prosperous country (U.S.A.) and live a relatively good life?

The issue can be that your life is so good that you actually have time to get bored and sad. People who live in more challenging areas, such as Brazil, don’t have time to get sad and depressed. They always have to remain on the move to survive. Having the time to be sad would be a luxury for them.

If you’re sad and depressed, try to challenge yourself day in and day out. Clearly, you have too much time on your hands to dwell on those few things you don’t happen to have in life. Create a list of tasks that’ll pose a challenge for you to complete.

Do something before you become addicted to the negative and depressed emotions. Embrace your emotions, but then get over it. You can’t waste your entire life sitting around being sad and depressed. It’s time for you to create a challenge for yourself, and purpose to your days.

Sometimes an alcohol hangover, bad diet, lack of sunlight or lack of exercise can be exacerbating the issue. If you know you’re slacking in those areas of your life, then it’s time to get them fixed. Now is the time to get the ball rolling.

I’ve visited family in Mexico who are so poor that they can’t afford to live in a home equipped with an indoor kitchen. Their kitchen is a grill outside. When I went to their house to visit, with my Uncle, they offered us corn on the cob. They mentioned that they had been eating corn on the cob all week, for every meal of the day. That’s all they could afford to eat for the week. They weren’t even sad about it, because they mentioned it casually.

They were very fun to be around. They spent most of their time smiling and joking around. They had a difficult life in Mexico, but were a lot more happy than some of my family and friends here in the good ol’ U.S.

That’s probably one of the biggest realization I made while visiting Mexico. That you don’t need anything to be happy. Happiness is a choice. So, if you’re sad or depressed right now, make the choice to be happy.

The World is a Mirror

I’ve noticed that a lot of times others will mirror back your feelings. The world is a mirror. Specifically, when dealing with other people.

If you’re acting cold towards someone, they’ll act cold towards you.

If you’re acting rude towards someone, they’ll act rude towards you.

If you’re being nice to someone, they’ll be nice to you.

If you’re acting friendly towards someone, they’ll act friendly towards you.

If you’re open to talking to strangers, strangers will be open to talking to you.

Obviously, this isn’t always 100% the case. But, it’s the case often enough that you should always keep this idea in mind.

Sometimes that cold person is simply being cold, because you’re being cold to them! It’s common enough that you shouldn’t overlook the possibility. I’ve experienced this myself, and I’ve heard examples of it from friends and family members.

Do you have a rude coworker, roommate or family member? Next time you run into them, pay close attention to how you act and treat them. The truth might surprise you.

Upgrade your gut feeling

Can you upgrade your gut feeling? Is that even possible?

I think so.

Find the people that you would like to operate more closely to and hangout with them. If you can’t hangout with them, read their books, essays, watch their videos or listen to their podcasts. Do this as much as possible everyday. Even more than you are comfortable with.

Remember what Seth Godin wrote, “Doing the best I can is actually not the same as, ‘doing everything I can.’ When we tell people we’re doing the best we can, we’re actually saying, ‘I’m doing the best I’m comfortable doing.’ As you’ve probably discovered, great work makes us uncomfortable.’ 

You might only be dedicating ten minutes per day to reading, but is that all you can do? You can probably do a lot more. Upgrading your gut feeling is not easy, and it certainly won’t happen anytime soon with a weak effort.

As time passes you’ll begin to notice yourself thinking and acting differently. You’ll say and do things that you’ll recognize from the people that you’re trying to be more similar to. That’s a good thing. That was your goal from the beginning.

Immerse yourself in the world of those that you admire. Poor decision making comes from being immersed in the average. Most people immerse themselves in TV, sitcoms, TV commercials, radio commercials, radio music, Netflix, their complaining coworkers, and their complaining friends. That’s why they think the way they think. You can’t really blame them. Their gut feeling has taken the shape of their influences. If they’re hungry, they reach for the Doritos.

If you decide to upgrade your gut feeling, in terms of health, you’ll know it’s working when you reach for the raw almonds, over the Doritos, when you feel like having a small snack.

You can upgrade your gut feeling in regards to almost anything. There are people already living the way you want to live. All you got to do is find them, listen to them, and begin doing what they advise.